Overcoming
Your Own Unreasonable Expectations
Everyone
finds themselves too busy from time to time.
In frustration, it’s easy to find ourselves muttering, “There just aren’t
enough hours in the day to do it all!”
And that is true. We can’t do it
all. We aren’t even meant to do it
all. So why do we try?
Everyone has the same number of hours in our days. However, the uber-productive
performer has someone taking care of things behind the scenes. That person is doing $43,860 in billable
hours a month routing phone calls to a personal assistant. Billing is handled by someone else. So is
prep-work and marketing.
It All Takes Time
When you are
first starting out, you have it all on your shoulders. You are developing your product, your
marketing, your process, and dealing with the paperwork as you go.
And you
still have a home, a family, and yourself to take care of. All of it demands time and energy and care.
I found
myself frustrated that I couldn’t spend 8 hours on research and writing. I learned it was unreasonable to think I should. I need to consider marketing, ongoing
education and personal enrichment, and administrative tasks like ordering paper
and ink cartridges.
I also
learned that organization makes a big difference. Ok, I knew
that already, but I was struggling to figure out how to make that happen with a
small desk that I use for my home stuff.
I have education materials here for two businesses, plus other home
bills and projects. Where do I go with
it? It’s all a part of developing process.
I learned
that my health routines are essential to handling everything else
gracefully. It’s easier to shut down my
negative voice telling me how I should be able to do everything that my aunt
does, and my mom-in-law, and that lady I read about, and my work-at-home friend
in another state, and some other things I want to do, too. Oh, and the stuff my husband wants me to take
care of for him, too. And … I got lost.
Can’t. Do.
It. All. At. The. Same. Time!
I had to
step back and re-assess everything. I
needed to get back to priorities. It’s
work-life balance. It’s efficiency. It’s taking care of myself. It’s cutting out less valuable things.
So today, I
want to share with you some thoughts about priorities. It cuts out a lot of unreasonable expectations.
Know Where You Are Going
and How You’ll Get There
The first
key is your vision. What do you want to
accomplish? This would be your
mission. List that for all of the key
areas in your life. Some list 4 areas,
others write out up to 10 to dial it in better. Comment below if you want to see mine.
The second
key is how you plan to get there. What
skills do you need to develop to make it happen? Who do you need to mentor you? What are the steps to make it come together?
Know Your Personal Values
The third
key is valuing relationships. With a husband, and perhaps some kids, you have
priorities beyond your vision or dream.
You want to enjoy your family, too.
You want rich friendships. You
probably even want to be involved in your community.
The fourth,
but not least, you need to value you … your physical, mental, and spiritual
health. Neglecting any of these quickly
brings unbalance. What are the habits
that support your best you?
Directed Productivity
Getting
clear on what you want and where you are going lets you define the tasks that
will get you there. Those are your
priorities. Brain Tracy likes to ask, “What
are your highest value activities?”1 In other words, what are the
things you do that gives you the greatest results?
Knowing how
to manage people is essential. As Alan
Chapman puts it, “Other people’s demands on our emotional and time resources
are a significant aspect of life balance.”2 Sometimes those demands
are just life … someone’s in crisis and they need your help. Schedule around it.
If someone loves
to complain, be cost-aware and leave little room to tolerate that kind of
loss. They aren’t growing and changing
their situation. Schedule it out.
Alan goes on
to say, “If you do not manage these demands they will leave you with no
resource for yourself, your loved ones, your other passions in life, and the
changes you want to make in order to pursue them.”2
Saying No to Good
Things is Good
Carson Tate
didn’t mince words when she said, “Becoming aware of what impedes your ability
to focus and eliminating distractions so you can complete your work are
essential to enhancing your productivity.”3
Facebook is
a great example of this for me. I can waste
hours upon hours on Facebook. They have
the trending section. They have live
feeds. Contacts post all sort of memes
and … videos. I have a policy of
watching almost no video clips because I look up and 30 minutes is gone.
I learned I can’t possibly watch every video clip any more than I can read
every good book that’s out there. That
means I need to be comfortable turning away good
things. It hurts at first. But if my life is to matter, I MUST pick and
choose where I spend my time. So must you, my friend. Make it count.
There is a
time and a place for hanging out and not pursuing my goals. Those things must be in moderation. Not all things are beneficial for me. I resolve to choose wisely. My goals are worthy. So are yours.
How about
you? Have you found yourself sad to let good
stuff go so you could make room for better stuff?
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